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Tuesday, November 13, 2007

The Secret Life of Marky

My friend Marky has a secret life. He has an entire friend network I've never met. For the longest time I just assumed they were all made up, and served as an excuse why he couldn't accompany me on errands. Then I met one of his imaginary friends, and it turns out he's indeed a real person with a name and everything! But, of course, I instantly forgot his name, so when I see him around town I never say hello. Which isn't a big deal because I'm positive he hates me. There's no other explanation for his odd behavior.

It started at Cafe Niche when I was having brunch with my girlfriends. Non-imaginary friend sat down at the table next to us, drank a little coffee and then bolted to a table across the room. Recognizing him as one of Marky's friends I tried my best to keep the offensive brunch conversation to a minimum by not saying vagina over and over, so I knew that wasn't the reason for his move.

I noticed him again at one of my favorite lunch spots and he did his best to avoid any contact with me. Over the course of a month there's been quite a few run-ins, without any acknowledgment on either of our parts.

I can't help but wonder what Marky is telling his friends to make them hate me so. Is it that I made him leave the U game early to take me to the library? Or is it because I doubted their existence to begin with?

7 comments:

Midge said...

Well I think this Marky is imaginary, I mean who has a straight guy friend that is cool since highschool?

Bob said...

I remember when you thought I was an imaginary friend of ddr.

-Bob

jenny said...

maybe he just finds you very cute! i mean teenagers do this all the time; the logic is _don't_ talk to or look at the ones you like, because, behold!, someone can find out!

jenny said...

ehm,. not that i think you're all teenagers. my work environment has screwed with my thinking. obviously.

Anonymous said...

Well, yeah. Jeremy doesn't hate you, silly. He is just a terrible stalker, is all. I guess if I stop talking to my incredibly secret social network about how damn cool you are, they might not improperly tail you around town.

Should I do that, instead?

Anonymous said...

I love Caffe Niche.

Anonymous said...

if your guy has friends hes hiding from you its a really bad sign. Good luck with all that.