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Thursday, April 13, 2006

the day my mom tried to have me arrested.

i'm heading to the country for easter. i don't go home as much as i should. i blame my country allergies, but the truth is i go crazy there--out of my mind bored crazy. the town (if you can call it that) i grew up in is itsy bitsy. so, when i head down my mom always wants me to pick some things up for her, as the nearest target is an hour away (gasp!!). this list included lipstick and 2 boxes of claritin, a must have for country living, claritin-not lipstick. the first store i went to only had one box of claritin left. no biggie, more than one target in a day is a happy day for me! at the next store i decided to be a good daughter and pick up a couple more boxes, no reason for her to worry about making another trip soon.

this, was not my best idea.

while paying they asked for my drivers license, credit card safety precaution i assumed. notsomuch. i was asked to take a seat while they called the pharmacist. i've been flagged. store policies in utah changed last week. you're only allowed to buy one box per day; i'd already purchased my limit less than 20 minutes earlier. security and the pharmacist had a nice little chat with me about meth use in utah. while i'm not a chemist, i think that perhaps extracting the sudaphedrine to make meth is more trouble than it's worth.

the best part? the chat contained the words "homeland security" 5 times, none of which were uttered by me.

thanks, mom.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Time to find a new Target. There will be beeping evertime you ender the store. Maybe they will just allow you to be escorted each time. Hot rent-a-cop?

Anonymous said...

FUNNY STUFF!!

Anonymous said...

Have good hot dogs and cotton candy for me.
If only I lived closer and I didn't lose my rollerblades...the fun we could have!

Anonymous said...

You can get enough of the generic Claritin at Costco to last well into the fall. And it's ridiculously cheap. I love Costco.

Sarah Bellum said...

abby: finding a new target is like a holiday.

anon: thanks!

jen: easter in the country just isn't the same without you. maybe i can drag holli to the store with me. matt could use some alone time with the kids.

j2: thanks for the drug advice. i'll send ben, just in case....

tgi56 said...

I have to throw my support for the man on this one. You do strike me as a possible security risk to our "Homeland". Viva la government !!!

Annie, The Evil Queen said...

No good deed goes unpunished. Look at it this way, maybe now you'll qualify for your very own FBI file...

Sarah Bellum said...

tgi: shut-up.

annie: now that, would be fun. do you think they would let me have a pink file?

JM Bell said...

It's Title VII of the US Patriot Act.
Seriously.
Not just Utah.

I found out the day my wife and two of my kids all got sick with different symptoms. I went to buy three different bottles of medicine (One likes grape, one likes red grape, and one likes cherry). It was a fiasco. I had to buy one bottle at Albertsons, another at Smiths and a third at Walgreens.

The Patriot Act. THE PATRIOT ACT! Why do Republicans want me to have sick kids?