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Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Breaking the Bond

In my screwed up world a new gal pal is usually more exciting then a new boyfriend. No, I'm not a lesbian. Sad that I have to write that, but I know I'm going to get at least two emails asking just that. I repeat, NO LESBIAN HERE--unless you count my girl crush on Gwen Stefani.

Anyway.

I have few lifelong girlfriends. The ones I have mean the world to me, but as the years go by we have less and less in common. This doesn't mean for a second I love them less, it just means I need to find partners-in-crime for my daily activities.

Enter the new gal pals. Each time I meet one I'm thrilled at the prospect of a new friend, and instantly force a connection with them. And each time it quickly fades, just like with new boyfriends. We find we have less in common or I find I don't trust them at all.

So in the end I feel like I'm dating men and women, and that's just exhausting. Am I?

13 comments:

Not telling said...

Stick to your male friends. Women friendships are far too complicated and what do you get out of it beyond shopping buddy.

My wife gave up on women years ago. So much for that fantasy scene.

urban princess said...

...instantly force a connection with them...

That's an interesting choice of words.

mark said...

I prefer sarah stick to her male friends, too.

More for me....

Midge said...

Not all girls are as cool as me, sorry I can't be your full time PIC anymore. Just try not to pick anymore girls who are on the FBI's most wanted list.

Anonymous said...

Who don't you trust?

Sarahbellum said...

not telling: I guess I'm drawn with the pretense that women understand women. Which I'm starting to realize is bullshit.

UP: It makes sense to me.

Mark: You just don't want me to see movies with anyone but you. I'm cool with that.

Midge: Yes, this is all your fault. And Jen, and Milinda, and Aimee. Had you guys not been so great maybe these others would match up. I'd forgotten about the FBI girl. However, that happened afterwards. Think I drove her to it? We need a date soon. I miss Ike.

Anon: Now do you really expect me to answer that? Even though I'm having lady issues, I'll remain a lady by not telling.

Lincoln said...

A good friend of mine told me about an article he read which stated most men, by age 30, already have the closest friends they'll ever have. That sort of makes me sad...thinking i'm about to stop making friends. Maybe the word "dating" can be used to describe the act of meeting new people in general and forming a connection with them. I'm not exactly sure what I'm saying here but...no I don't think it's wierd.

D said...

Have you considered you might be choosing the wrong type of women? Where are you meeting them and what exactly causes the fallout. You compared to dating does that mean the girls end up boring you or do you find little things about them.

d said...

Another question do you trust your male friends more?

Dave said...

are you a lesbian?

Bellum's Token Brunette said...

As one of your gal pals what's the skinny? I can't take the vagueness. Spill da beans sister.

Anonymous said...

Maybe the problem is you?

Sarahbellum said...

lincoln: That's really sad. I don't want to think that once we reach a certain age we're done with new friends.

d: Your question only reinforces the dating comparison.

d: I think I trust them more in different ways. As one of my male friends pointed out to me today, I discuss different things to them. Perhaps I don't trust them with such important life details, therefore maintaining a trust longer? If that makes sense.

dave: only for you, and gwen!

token brunette: Not on here, my dear.

anon: It's entirely possible. After all, I grew up sister-less so am used to trusting men and having more friendships with them.

UP: I just noticed I never finished my comment to you. Sorry! I think most people do it. When we meet someone new, we try and find as many things in common as possible.