New Website Redirect.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

The Bird Flu Ruined my Week

The last time I felt this horrible was when I had kidney stones three years ago and spent Christmas in the ICU. Which, in hindsight, wasn’t all that bad. Midge brought movies and cuddled in bed with me. The pain was somewhat tolerable with a Morphine drip. However, once I started seeing the face of Jesus in the wallpaper I made them take it out. Talk about ruining a good time.

My body has never handled germs of any kind very well. I’m a chronic puker. When I was in high school a doctor accused me of being bulimic when, after a case of Mono, I couldn’t stop throwing up for weeks. My mother in her prime mama bear days got angry with the doctor and reminded him I’ve had a weak stomach since I was a very tiny baby. As a nurse, she was always very involved when I was sick. Perhaps that’s why, at 32, the minute I feel sick I want my mom taking care of me. And if I asked she’d drop everything and drive two hours to get here, just to rub my back or get me a drink of Gatorade. Since it’s my dad’s birthday tomorrow I’m not asking her to drive up. After all, he only has a birthday every four years.

What I thought was a cold is a full-fledged case of the bird flu—self-diagnosed of course. Sure, I get flu symptoms with a minor headache, but this is beyond ridiculous. I can’t even keep a sip of water down. Not to mention, every part of my body hurts, even my eyebrows. Which is all very inconvenient given that I had a math midterm tonight and a Lost party to attend.

I promised my mom if I wasn’t feeling better tomorrow I’d go in and have then hydrate me with an IV, but until then I’m going to lay on the couch, continue to whine, watch trash TV and remind myself over and over what the silver lining of being sick is...

SKINNY JEANS!

Obviously, I'm going to look really good after this "diet" helps me fit back into them.

13 comments:

Midge said...

I want to come cuddle you.
You win, you are sicker than me, but atleast you awakened at 3am by a little man.
I hope you get better soon sweety, I'll dream of cuddling you all night.

Charlotte in Pa said...

You realize that this is all your fault, right? In your post about getting Arlo's date cancelled, you "prayed" for a skinnier ass. Karma... err... Jesus is a bitch, I guess. Hope you feel better soon!

Anonymous said...

I thought it was because she hates NASCAR. But perhaps you are right Charlotte.

Anonymous said...

Sounds dreadful! I hope you feel better as quickly as possible.

Thanks for posting this because after reading your Twitters (why do people call them Tweets?) I was wondering if you were okay.

That one girl, Kiesha said...

Too bad you are sick, tomorrow is Pug meet up day. Next time, maybe?

Scott the Stray said...

Sorry to hear you're feeling so bad. Something going around here too, everyone is sick. If you were sick because how much you hated NASCAR I would be sick every day of the year. Glad I don't believe in Karma and all that. Unless Karma is some greek term meaning bacteria and virus's. Feel better!

Anonymous said...

Get lots of sleep. That's the best thing you can do and if possible skip the wine for a few days.

mrs. ak said...

i shall send rlo in a naughty nurse outfit with a peanut wotnot shake prompto.

ak said...

fluids!

you were missed at the Capitol today.

Anonymous said...

World Of Warcraft gold for cheap
wow power leveling,
wow gold,
wow gold,
wow power leveling,
wow power leveling,
world of warcraft power leveling,
world of warcraft power leveling
wow power leveling,
cheap wow gold,
cheap wow gold,
buy wow gold,
wow gold,
Cheap WoW Gold,
wow gold,
Cheap WoW Gold,
world of warcraft gold,
wow gold,
world of warcraft gold,
wow gold,
wow gold,
wow gold,
wow gold,
wow gold,
wow gold,
wow gold
buy cheap World Of Warcraft gold e3n6x7ms

Sarah Bellum said...

midge: I wish you could. Being sick is never as bad when I have my Midge. Sorry you and Ikeboy are sick as well.

charlotte in pa: You're right, it's totally my fault. Damn it, I need to be careful what I wish, err, pray for.

anon: Could be that too. Hard to tell.

anon: Twitter is the bomb! Get it.

kiesha: I'm going next time. Let me know when. Sounds fun!

scott: Thanks. And I promise, I'll call you back soon.

anon: Off the wine. And my how I've missed it!

mrs. ak: HOT!

ak: Fluids without wine and coffee are really, really hard.

runescape power leveling said...

where you come from!

百变双扣游戏 said...

For the same things, the different experiences of people always give a different experience, very good article!
Personalized signatures:Personalized signatures:面对面视频斗地主,面对面视频游戏下载,淮安掼蛋,常州三打一,常州麻将